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18 June 2005 @ 01:49 pm
eee!  
OMG! In the three years since I last looked at the Harlequin submission requirements, they have totally turned around! Now they're all "NOOOO, formula BAD!" and encouraging things like slutty characters and twisted "modern" sex stories and SUPERSPIES WHO HAVE SEX WHILE SAVING THE WORLD, OMG.

(No mention of other planets, alas. I think Harlequin is still ix-nay on the ience-fiction-say.)

I could dust off and write my old "School for Scandal" story that I shelved because *gasp* for a while the protagonist's in love with a dude who's Bad News and who's also sleeping with her roommate! (before, you know, protagonist finds her Real True Love in the dude's best friend/cousin/something. Of course.) (This by me is very exciting. Shush. It came from the Amanda's Wedding era of Little Red's writing style and, er, life where everyone was sleeping with everyone and there was much confusion and amusing sarcastic smuttiness before the happy ending.)

I could write a trashy romance spy novel!!!! SPIES! (Sadly, they must be modern day spies, as there doesn't seem to be a line for cold-war era romance. DAMMIT! I'll have to look more closely.)

K, I'm excited now.

Of course, I'm also feeling the temptation to put on the brakes a bit. "I should just take months and months first to read spy novels and romance novels and then I can come up with a perfect plot!" *fear* But that's unnecessary. My tendency is to want to have allll my ducks in a row (yes, that's my favorite saying lately) and prepared for all contingencies before taking any steps toward anything, but that very often means that nothing changes and nothing gets done. Perhaps a deadline that's unreasonable for Absolute Utter Perfection is the way to go here. Possibly I should rip out the brakes all together. *eeps*

(I'm also feeling the desire to put myself down for seeing this as a "big deal" because it's only trashy popular fiction. Dear Brain: I know that. It's still a big deal for me, and I'm going to damned well be psyched about it.)

(apt icon provided by qwirky from a long-ago icon challenge)

****

Aaaaaaaaaand, some very bad news that just came in the mail: one of my big scholarships for returning to school has been revoked because I was sick for a semester too long. Damn. :( *has angst*
 
 
feel: anxiousmixed
 
 
 
NEXT TIME I'M IN CHURCH, PLEASE NO PHOTOS: {gen}; indier than thoudaygloparker on June 18th, 2005 06:10 pm (UTC)
SOVIET SPY SEX. Goddammit. I miss the Cold war.
Little Red: sg - sekrit robot gf - thefakeheadlinemylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 06:13 pm (UTC)
I KNOW! OMG! WTF!!

Maybe... it could be modern-day spies but involve old Soviet spies? I've always wanted to write a spy novel called "The Prodigal Spy" (although the plotline I'd thought of wasn't exactly Harlequin-friendly. But I heart that title.)

I also heart your icon. Bwah ha ha.

WHY DO I NOT HAVE ANY SPY ICONS!?!???? THIS IS SO WRONG!
(no subject) - daygloparker on June 18th, 2005 06:16 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 06:20 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - liminalliz on June 18th, 2005 09:09 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:23 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - thepouncer on June 19th, 2005 04:11 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 04:13 am (UTC) (Expand)
Rose Wilde-Irishrosewildeirish on June 18th, 2005 06:23 pm (UTC)
*chants* Rip out the brakes! Rip 'em out!

*g*

*snuggles over bad news*
Little Red: xf - diana slut - liminallizmylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 06:34 pm (UTC)
It's either bad or good that I picture "ripping out brakes" in a very literal way ;)

And yes. 'Tis sad. Arg. I can reapply, and I can go into more debt, so it's in no way impossible to go back. It's just a bummer, because I like things to be easy.
Julie, betrayer of the literary traditionsplash_the_cat on June 18th, 2005 07:19 pm (UTC)
Tor Books has a paranormal romance subdivision. And Tor is very genre-friendly.

http://www.tor.com/paranormalromance/about/submissions.html

From that site:

These are the general subcategories we are looking for under the general heading of "paranormal romance":

1. science fiction / futuristic
2. fantasy
3. horror / otherworldly beings (i.e., vampires, goblins, faeries, ghosts, banshees, zombies, golem, etc.)
4. shape-shifters (werewolves, etc.)
5. near-future / speculative fiction
6. time travel
7. possessed objects
8. alternate history / alternate timelines
9. reincarnation / love through time
10. witches / witchcraft
11. psychic abilities (clairvoyance, ESP, psychometrics, telekinesis, etc.)
Little Red: sg - sekrit robot gf - thefakeheadlinemylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:08 pm (UTC)
....... *stunned*

OMG! Really!?? I MUST look for these books on my Barnes & Noble / Price Chopper / drugstore book run tonight!

*tackles you with great love* How cool!

(And now a question that shows I don't know you very well at all -- you've said you write profic; do you write for these people and that's how you knew about this?)
(no subject) - splash_the_cat on June 19th, 2005 03:43 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 03:46 am (UTC) (Expand)
Pooh: SGA - Shep that look (by goldie_gal)mspooh on June 18th, 2005 07:21 pm (UTC)
*hugs over the scholarship news* Losing money sucks.

When can I preorder my copy of Little Red's Harlequin supaspy smut?
Little Red: gleee! - nenyamylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:10 pm (UTC)
*sulks* IT DOES!!

I suppose I can see how this is karmically better -- I have to REALLY DECIDE to go back to school (and thus want it more and be more committed) because it will be soooo much harder to do. But, arg. It's still highly annoying.

I am surprised, however, that my dad didn't seem to care. He was all delighted and "It's an omen that you shouldn't go back to Brown!" Hrm.

*twirls* I think my novel may be decided by a livejournal poll. Supaspy smut? Modern romance of university scandal? Wacky sci-fi hijinks that splash_the_cat tells me above are also publishable?
(no subject) - pellmelody on June 19th, 2005 01:45 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 01:51 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - pellmelody on June 19th, 2005 02:00 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 02:42 am (UTC) (Expand)
rogue equestrian: DW: Captain Naked!Jackelvinborn on June 18th, 2005 07:23 pm (UTC)
a break-free ride is always more exciting!

any first novel of your very own writing is a big deal. I find it all very exciting just vicariously. (and it's abuse of the language like that which keeps me from writing)
...
SPIES!!
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:14 pm (UTC)
*nervous re: brakes*

*nervous in general*

But eeeee! Going to buy fun books to read for research purposes bwah ha ha.

And thank you for the encouragement -- I AGREE, and from now on will tell my brain to SHUT UP. And be happier for it! Yay.
elliejaneelliejane on June 18th, 2005 07:41 pm (UTC)
On the subject of "trashyromancenovels"...hee! Way back when, I used to read "Mills and Boon" books (do you have those in the US? I'm thinking they must be like Harlequin?). And they were sweet, and romantic and then I stopped reading them.

When I came BACK to reading such things in the last couple so years, I was like WTF!! F???? Lots of F???? F-ing???? Then I realised that all modern "trashyromancenovels" have loads and loads of teh sex in them! (At the least the ones that I read do, ahem.)

And since then I have become sightly addicted to them (looks innocent) and yes, there have been spies and Navy Seals! And the heroines are becoming less pure, and there was mild bondage and honey in the last one, and in the one before that the heroine was a reformed alcoholic who didn't think she was good enough for the hero, woah!!

And there I was thinking for years that romance novels (again the ones I read, ahem) were for old spinsterish grannies who wanted a bit of romance! All I can say is "Wow, do grannies have impure thoughts, hee!!"

I will say I still do see a bit of formula there - "boy meets girl, boy and girl have teh sex, boy and girl have immovable obstacle to their being together, obstacle gets removed, then they have teh sex again, possibly get married and have babies."

At one point I wanted to write one. And although I've pointed out to my Ma that if I did write a "TRN" I would have to write teh sex, I'm not sure how she'd react to the actualities of it. Or me for that matter - but heck, I've written fanfic pr0n, you'd THINK I'd be able to write pr0n between non-Farscape people. But then John and Aeryn sex is so....mmmmmmmmm yummy. As is Shep and Lizzie sex. Sigh.

Anyways. Sorry for huges spammy post! But it was about teh sex so, yay maybe?

Also am sorry for your scholarshippy probs. Gives a (((virtual hug))) to LittleRed, who I don't really know but whose posts I read avidly anyways! :) Please if you do write an novel, let us all know! You are one of a few fic writers who I avidly (uh, uh repetition!) devour fic wise and whom I would love to see in print :) :)
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:22 pm (UTC)
They have TOTALLY CHANGED!!! On the upside, we no longer have I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER on the cover and women getting raped by Indians for their own good, so, that's a plus!

And Mills & Boon is owned by Harlequin, because Harlequin owns every single romance novel ever ever ever, apparently. I think it's just the UK version of it. Most Harlequin lines have equivalent Mills & Boon lines, etc. *shrugs* These are things I have learned today on my romance novel researching spree.

My father has actually *read* one of my sex-including fics before. He didn't seem to mind, but it has completely ruined my ability to re-read that story, so I think in the future I'll give them edited versions.

Dude, by the time this novel is written, you will all be SO SICK of hearing about it! I'll definitely let you know. :)

OMG, how is this still seeming like a good idea!? Am I really going to QUIT MY JOB tomorrow this week!!???!?? Eep.
tarkheena lizzeeen: sw - lukeliminalliz on June 18th, 2005 09:10 pm (UTC)
*wants scifi trashy novels, omfg*
tarkheena lizzeeen: [OMFG] - x-filesliminalliz on June 18th, 2005 09:10 pm (UTC)
IN SPACE WITH SOVIET SPIES TOO!
(no subject) - liminalliz on June 18th, 2005 09:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:13 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:13 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - liminalliz on June 18th, 2005 09:17 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 18th, 2005 09:27 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - elliejane on June 18th, 2005 10:28 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 01:56 am (UTC) (Expand)
entertaining in a disturbing waylyssie on June 18th, 2005 09:28 pm (UTC)
I think I'm still stuck on you being required to have plot. Most romance novels are sex, sex, some dialogue, some stupid misunderstanding, and moer sex.

Alias sucks. Sorry, I can only go so long without saying it.

Hrm. Now I want to watch Man From UNCLE and The Prisoner.
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 01:58 am (UTC)
I think some lines are actually defined that way. ;) There are number of different sub-genres of romance, apparently.

OMG. I BOUGHT THE WORST BOOK TONIGHT. Amid other trashy romance novels (for research purposes), I bought one called "Unearthed" in which an aspiring singer-songwriter is ABDUCTED AND BROUGHT INTO SPACE FOR AN ALL-IMPORTANT INTERGALACTIC MISSION. That involves her SINGING. This has to be the worst book ever written, and I really can't wait to start it.

... it becomes clearer and clearer to me that, no, this is not just my idea of a possible way to make money, but actually a really good career choice for me. ;)
dark_faith366: torridark_faith366 on June 18th, 2005 09:55 pm (UTC)
OMG ! you are going to write novels ??? you mean we'll have tons of pages of angst and porn and... porn ??

No seriously I'm so happy for you !!!! I mean, is that what you wanna do for a living and all ? Cause anyway, you have the talent !! Good luck hun'

*hugs*
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 01:59 am (UTC)
*laughs* Yes! Tons of pages! And perhaps my characters will be enough like John & Elizabeth so that you can pretend. ;)

This is what I've been saying I wanted to do for a living for YEARS, and now I'm going to try it! :)

Thank you so much for the encouragement. *loves you*
Abusus non tollit usumlavidaessueno on June 18th, 2005 09:56 pm (UTC)
I think you're probably better off trying to sell your manuscript to an agent. Lots of publishers won't take unagented submissions, and a good agent will know more about the market / editors and can shop it around for you.
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 02:01 am (UTC)
Ooooh, good idea. I hadn't actually thought of that, because I'm kind of ridiculous and just read all the harlequin pages about "send us unagented submissions, omg! we want books!" But yay!! First, of course, I need a manuscript, but then I will come back to you for more sane thoughts. :)

I still feel like it can't hurt to try and fit the requirements and tone of one of the existing women's fiction series, especially since the requirements have become so much broader in the past few years. *shrugs* (Plus, reading lots of books will hopefully spark my creative brain.)
(no subject) - lavidaessueno on June 19th, 2005 03:29 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 03:34 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - lavidaessueno on June 19th, 2005 03:56 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 04:04 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - lavidaessueno on June 21st, 2005 05:36 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Bitch-extraordinaire!: Cute familysakuracorr on June 18th, 2005 10:14 pm (UTC)
Any form of writing is a BIG DEAL and worth feeling excited over! Though I think if you did publish a Harlequin romance novel, my mom would wonder if I'd gone crazy buying one!

*cuddles and pets over bad news*
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 02:36 am (UTC)
:-P They're SO FUN!! Romance novels are just such fantastic escapism.

I'm okay with the bad news... except for that my parents are REJOICING, or so it seems, that this means for sure that the Brown costs will be prohibitive for me and therefore I won't go back. I mean... I get it. They don't want me to die from my own stubbornness. But I WANT MY DEGREEEEEEEE. *makes fist at universe* I'll get it if I want it badly enough, I guess.
Lisa Yaegerlisayaeger on June 18th, 2005 11:30 pm (UTC)
If you want (and it sounds like maybe you don't?), you could call Brown and ask if a doctor's note would be acceptable proof to reinstate your $$??
Little Red: trek - alamo - celestialwillowmylittleredgirl on June 19th, 2005 02:39 am (UTC)
It actually wasn't Brown. The Ivy League doesn't actually let schools give merit scholarships, so all that is based on financial need (I don't know how the need-based evaluation changes as I get older). This was a local scholarship that helped me make up a lot of the difference so that I was able to go. They know me, so there's always a chance they'll give it to me again when I reapply, but, like I said, I like things to be easy!!

Thanks for the advice, though! I appreciate it a lot. :)
(no subject) - lisayaeger on June 19th, 2005 02:41 am (UTC) (Expand)
רותם שחר (Ro): bingroothekittykat on June 19th, 2005 03:08 pm (UTC)
quack!

sorry to hear about the scholarship :|
*huggles*
-a.frog/gorf.a-froggoddess on June 19th, 2005 03:10 pm (UTC)
this is somewhat belated, but i wanted to add my voice to the deafening chorus of voices that seem to be singing yay sachi go write that novel! you rock and are now officially my trashyromancenovelsuperheroine. good luck!
Mercymercscilla on June 22nd, 2005 02:06 pm (UTC)
I love, drool over and lust after trashy romance novels too *blushes*

They all said what I wanted to say *pouts* That happens when you're late *thud*

Ok, then I'll give you this: ^-^

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Little Red: trashy romance novels! - qwirkymylittleredgirl on June 22nd, 2005 02:25 pm (UTC)
aiieeeeeeeeeeee!!

OMG! That is the BESTEST THING EVER!!! (and I went to your journal and downloaded the bigger DRR wallpaper -- forget if I commented or not! YAY!)

OMG! EEEEE!! *stares at new banner in excitement*

omg, you are so my newbestfriend.
(no subject) - mercscilla on June 22nd, 2005 02:29 pm (UTC) (Expand)
jacksrubberduck: moments when i know - Sam/Jack SG-1jacksrubberduck on June 25th, 2005 11:02 pm (UTC)
Is responding to this hideously late but oh well...

Erm I can't remember whether it was Mills and Boon or Silhouette but I have read at least 3 romance novels that involve time travel and science fiction themes.

And these were fairly generic not heavily advertised as sci fi genre books. Mum wouldn't have bought them if they were. In fact one was part of a big series that wasn't about sci-fi at at all.

And none of this was possibly at all helpful. Or even interesting...