August 12th, 2005

sga - sparktober

I live!

What did I miss?

Random observations from the past week:

Addiction: Mmmm... addiction. The only time I actually started twitching for the intarweb was when I was six kinds of bored at work, but er, yes. It was good to notice my addict-y habits, though. Also nice to have a break, because I actually solved the sleeve-cap problem on a sweater I'm knitting.

Subconscious Says "April Fools!" I had a dream in which I discovered that I was all deeply and subconsciously in love with Justin, which is considerably more hilarious to those who actually know us. But don't worry, keenween! I woke up all "what in the!?", and then realized that that ("that" being "girl discovers she is sekritly in love with her roommate, who is totally a lesbian trapped in a man's body") was the exact plot of the novel I'd fallen asleep reading. Oops. Nonetheless, it was pretty weird for a few minutes there.

Romance Novel, Yay! My *own* romance novel is starting to take shape. It is VERY VERY SILLY, such that I keep wobbling back and forth between "heee!" and "omg, shame!". I realized that I ripped off both daygloparker's name and her story about dahlias without realizing it for a character who's rather shamelessly slutty, and so, er, sorry! *deletes* However, should anyone actually want their name to be bestowed on a random secondary character in my very silly romance novel, let me know! :)

Romance Novel, Cont'd: I might be searching for what I can only term a Very Very Very Forgiving Audience for my first draft as I'm writing it. The thing is... I feel kind of weird asking anyone to volunteer, because I'm looking for a very specific kind of support. It's very much a first draft and I mostly need "omg, squeee! When will there be a next chapter? Oooo, is so-and-so going to actually kiss that guy?" kind of things, because I'm worried that if I get bogged down in the actual constructive criticism this thing really does need, I might never finish it. I plan to go over it completely myself before even showing it to a beta. All of this might change but... yeah, I'm in need of an inspiration-crutch more than a proper beta squad at the moment. ;) So, anyone who wants a sneak peek and doesn't mind having their freedom of comment infringed upon / potentially losing respect for my unedited writing ski11z, yay!

Drama, Drama, Drama. Yes, well, the *other* side of not having the internet is that, with the lack of perpetual distraction (combined with the fact that my immune system is helplessly flailing at some bug or other), the personal demons and other realities get a bit harder to ignore. Kind of, er, lit into my father when he seemed to be insinuating that I was just kicking back at home because I'm Lazy and Scared Of The Real World Which Is Nothing To Be Ashamed Of (grrrrr!) and because Kripalu Girls Just Can't Seem To Leave The Nest. We had a long conversation that ended up being probably good, but left me a bit worried about my actual mental and emotional state underneath all the coping mechanisms that work but with quite a bit of effort. Eh. I want to talk it out more and explain what all is going on, because it feels too big to deal with by myself, but I'm a bit too worn out right now and I think I'd end up with just nonsensical flailing. *shrugs*

The Last Word: No, really, what did I miss?