Please stop pooping on my carpet.
Dear Little Red, Body Of:
You know that thing you do, where you get so tired for no reason that it's like constant screaming in my ears? Stop that.
Dear Red Sox:
OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING PLEASE START ROCKING IMMEDIATELY KTHANX.
You have reached your quota of SNAFU for the day, and it is only 11:30 in the a.m. Please be advised that exceeding your quota will not be looked upon favorably by the management.
More Sparky please!
-- Little Red