OKAY. After so long away, I think Glee might have had to set off a nuclear bomb of glitter and pom-poms to match my level of anticipation. I'm just saying. Given that particular level of expectation, I say the show did pretty okay.
Things I did not love:
I think it was the first time I was like "OMG I HATE U WHERE IS MY FAST-FORWARD" in any musical numbers. Jesse St. James is indeed entertaining, but Lionel Richie's "Hello"? Did you have to? Look, I'm sure lots of people have really great associations with that song and all, but it's kind of crap. I complained about it to Das Boy, and he was like "Oh, it's perfect they'd do it on Glee, since it originally was a teacher and a student," and I was like "OH. Well if they'd done THAT I might have been pleased at their wittiness instead of going into the other room to make food."
When they then segued into Will and Emma dancing to terribly boring Jazz classics I was like PLEASE NO. Actually, the song was fine, it was just -- WILL AND EMMA ARE INSANELY BORING. They actually weren't that boring last season when Emma was drawing hearts in the yearbook and Will was in deep relationship denial, but somehow they got together and completely cancelled out all the interestingness they might have had. Obvy, they are the showtp, so we can't have them completely crash and burn and treat each other badly, but that would have been interesting. Anyway, they broke up now, and Will can go slut it up, which might be awesome.
On the other gay shark:
OH MY GOD. BRITTANY AND SANTANA FOR THE COMPLETE AND UTTER WIN. Srsly, this episode could have been 100% Lionel Richie and it still would have been saved by Britt's one-liners. "We were seduced by the glitz and glamor of show biz." Oh, love. And Santana at her finest and bitchiest. "You buy us dinner, then we make out in front of you. It's, like, the best deal ever. Actually, could you wait in the car?"
QUINN. MORE ABOUT QUINN. Srsly, I have spent the whole hiatus wondering where she is living, and now I guess she's at Puck's, or something, because they're apparently together despite her rather awesomely telling him to go the hell away in "Sectionals." So, that irritated me because it would've been pretty sweet to see Quinn on her own, but Puck saved it all by telling her to quit getting fat ("I'm PREGNANT" "And that's MY fault?"). I'm Team Quinn, but I'm also Team Quinn Finding A Man Who's Not A Total Moron.
Terri Schuester, in one scene, went from being a shrill needy harpy to a scheming awesome bitch and I would like to see A LOT MORE OF HER.
Idina Menzel, apparently? I wouldn't have known her on sight, but I figured it out. The first time through the episode, I thought she seemed kind of drunk? Or somehow oddly delivering her lines? But I watched the episode a second time and now love her, because she's evil and scheming and talks about show choir while making out. Will Schuester is such a crazy magnet.
Finn Hudson, Rock Star. His Doors number was pretty freaking great. I also liked "Hello, Goodbye" because it's a favorite Beatles song of mine. "Gives You Hell" wasn't a total favorite, but I love it when the kids actually have a good time together. And then Will ruins it for them, by telling them Glee Club will be cancelled if they don't quit having so much fun. Sigh.
Things I said I would not do with Glee:
FANDOM. I went through the whole first half of the first season without even an icon, until I broke down a week ago and got sucked into reading FANFIC. I said I wouldn't do this! It's a very short walk from "I wonder if anyone on LJ has the Rolling Stones pictures up" to scouring the internet for happy-ever-after Finn/Quinn fanfic (IDK, I REALLY DON'T) and guys, I don't want to write Glee fanfic! I don't! It's inevitable, isn't it.