Up-side: I can now debug all kinds of shit on my mac using command-line programming shenanigans on the Terminal app I did not previously know existed.
Which is good, because at about hour 2 I felt like my entire resume was a lie. (I HAVE NO COMPUTER SKILLS AND CANNOT TROUBLESHOOT OR SOLVE PROBLEMS CREATIVELY AND SO ALL THAT IS LEFT IS FILING.)
Conclusion: I'm pretty sure 90% of my admin superpowers are just effective googling skills.