Little Red (mylittleredgirl) wrote,
Little Red

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Bad week.

Now in day five of a 24-hour bug. Yay Vichy immune system.

Spent the past few weeks having a back-and-forth with the Brown administration. Or really just... forth... because they don't call or write me back and are totally unavailable any time I call, even the secretaries. It would be more fun if I was being intentionally stonewalled, but I am just not that important.

Sick has reduced me to whole new levels of inept. Can't remember words or process how to do basic things (remember the "socks off before shower, Sachi" phase? Not quite that bad, at least. Just almost). Seth kept mocking me yesterday because my brain kept stalling out mid-sentence, so I'd start talking and then end up just staring because I can't remember what I am in the process of saying. Not to mention how I fared at work. Too off to sleep properly, too tired to do anything because I'm useless if I don't get 14 *quality* hours. Am back in that place from a few months ago where I can't even watch TV or write a livejournal entry I don't hate or talk to people on yahoo because I can't process what people are saying.

Good things *are* happening, it's just beyond my level of energy to properly appreciate them (I have been thinking of... revising? Not the right word. The one that means 'bring something back'. Anyway, I have been thinking of that-ing Joy Sadhana, that whole santosha/ anti-depression/ always-look-on-the-bright-side-of-life campaign where I write out five good things that happened and three things I did well at the end of every day. I can only imagine that would annoy people on LJ, since Angst And Disaster is more interesting to read about, or something, but I might do it anyway).

The world is really in no way coming apart around me. Things are fine. It's just that I'm sick. I'm just sick all the fucking time.

Huh. I feel a little better after that bout of rage. Maybe I can sleep more now.

-- Little Red

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