Some of it I can't talk about yet -- I'm in a rare place for me where I need to be alone with a choice, to make myself okay with where I am and where I am or am not going before I can face the world like that.
And because the exercise of joy sadhana is to find joy in everything:
The past few days have made this clear to me: I would rather be a Red Sox fan in a series like this than not be a Red Sox fan. Never give up, never back down. Keep the Faith.
5 good things about today:
1. Beauty everywhere. I don't know what happened, because my emotional walls were so worn down by my unexpected Life Processing before work, by lack of sleep, by break in illness, but I could feel everything. Sense perception at an all-time high. Colours are bright and beautiful, music intricate, the cold outside felt so good on my skin. I felt alive and awake in my body, like I have been wrapped up in cotton for so long I learned to move with it and was just cut free.
2. Ran into *two* people by coincidence, beloved friends from YEARS ago that I never thought I would see again. They both look great, and called me glowing.
3. Best. Dinner. EVER. Oh my God. Liza gave me a dinner break and it was seriously the Kripalu dinner I have been dreaming about since last summer (which is sad that I dream about dinners at work, but it's THAT GOOD). Oh my God, olive bread. I FREAKED OUT with gleee in the dining chapel and scared people.
4. Woke up to planning mini!OTP community with kataclysmic!! Livejournal thwarted her attempts to make it pretty while I was at work (grr) but you should go and join the emptyblankcommunity now and be wowed later when it shapes up and we announce it proper: miniotp
5. Got a call from victorycabbage. I am going to see Kappas tomorrow!!
3 things I did well:
1. Made it through most of unplanned paternal Life Intervention (I love my family, and wow are we ever Kripalu nutjobs) good and collected.
2. Remembered to bring iThor to work to copy CDs for Liza.
3. Kicked serious retail ass at work.
And. What in the hell?
Sam Carter's broken toaster is for sale.
I really thought besyd made that up as a funny because of that toaster fic I wrote...
Health willing, I am hopefully off to Providence tomorrow (!!!). Um. Hang out with me?
-- Little Red, who sends lots of love as only she can in the dazed, hippie zone she is in today.
p.s. Er... I am actually unspoiled for upcoming... everything... so if Sam's busted-ass toaster is, like, a pivotal plot point in an episode yet to be aired, don't tell me. And if it's a pivotal plot point in an episode that has already aired, please DO tell me, because that's something I need to know. And if besyd somehow engineered this after all, please tell me that too.