Little Red (mylittleredgirl) wrote,
Little Red

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I wax kinda moderate about the election, and gleee.

So... the obligatory election bit. Don't really feel comfortable posting what I've been writing and thinking. As someone who fears conflict and aims for middle ground and Everybody Getting Along And Learning About Each Other's Viewpoints, I'm a bit intimidated by so much feeling, and so charged, and so polarized.

I'm not angry. I'm frustrated, disappointed, and scared, and trying to be hopeful.

My very strange reaction to all of this has involved a desire to be a student of sorts in a conservative, religious, Republican household. I think, perhaps foolishly, that I will be less afraid if I have the chance to learn about this, to understand this part of my country that is so different from mine, if there is a way to do it without anyone feeling put on the offensive. I want to know. I don't think people in this election, on either side, voted out of ignorance; I think we all voted out of fear of the threats to our various ways of life. I am not an activist by nature -- it feels phony to me to do the things that so many of you do so well -- and I have felt useless and unpatriotic because of this.

In my happy little la-la land, I think our country wouldn't be so divided if everyone understood each other's positions better. Maybe there really isn't more to this than it appears -- maybe the ways we want to live our lives in the blue and the red states really are totally incompatible -- but I suspect we wouldn't cling so much to the extremes if we each didn't feel like the middle was going to be pulled away from us.

I can start with my extended family. Because they happen to be Canadian, they don't think that religion has a place in the government... so it's a bit different, and they didn't have to make this particular electoral choice. These are good, kind, loving Christians who I respect and love, and yet it was a big, difficult question whether they could continue to love and treat their son as their own because he moved in with his fiancee before they were married. I don't understand this. I want to. More and more, I feel like I need to.

For the next four years, I want to work on that.

Please don't tell me how stupid I am for my naivete or be offended by any accidental condescension that might be in this late-night, poorly-expressed post, for that will make me sad. I know many of you are liberals who grew up in conservative households and are probably no less scared than me for your knowledge. So this isn't a way of improving the nation, it's just a way of maybe improving myself.


5 good things about today:

1. My car is back from Blowtorch Joe's and all shiny and pretty and un-crunched! (lisayaeger? I think it really might be better than new!)

2. OMG!! LOOK at the icon maching_monkey made me!! I have a linguistics icon!

3. alliesings said something to make me feel very loved.

4. Unexpected evening watching Stargate with alosersdream :)

5. Got TWO WEEKS off work for road trip! Supervisor didn't even CARE because I am officially fill-in staff! I walked away from this conversation with a "you're so great!" instead of mutterings about my wenchiness.

3 things I did well:

1. Did "consulting" gig of setting up dad's friend's computer. Successfully did things. Received money for transferring bookmarks of Yankees fan sites and naked women. *scrubs self clean*

2. Picked up car.

3. Made brightly coloured salad.

-- Little Red, receiving much-needed hug from down comforter!

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